Jun 30 2008
What’s holding you back?
I’ve been an aspiring romance writer for well over 10 years. Perhaps, if I’m honest, I would say I’ve wanted to be an aspiring romance writer for well over 10 years.
I first joined the Detroit chapter of Romance Writers of America (RWA) but at the time I was a single mom who worked full-time, so I didn’t much have time for writing. Then I joined a Florida chapter of RWA, but I was newly married, trying to blend a family, partnering with a military spouse who was frequently deployed, worked full-time, so I didn’t much have time for writing. Then we moved and … the excuses continue. I kept telling myself, “When I have more time, when my kids are older, when I’m better at writing…”
Then I heard a speaker at one of my RWA meetings, and she made me see my excuses for what they were — a way to avoid failure, but also an obstacle to success. “There are women with breast cancer writing,” the speaker said. “There are women who work two or three jobs writing. There are women dealing with family issues like substance abuse, mental illness, divorce. If they can write, so can you.”
Some writers make the decision to write and do exactly that. Others of us — the perfectionists, procrastinators, overachievers — have such high standards that we don’t know how to let ourselves try, fall down and get back up again. Or maybe you’re not writing because your family scoffs at the idea. Maybe you’re still finding your niche. Maybe you don’t know where to start. Maybe you don’t think you have it in you.
It took a “come to Jesus” moment for me to get serious about writing, meaning I had to confront my excuses head-on. It’s tough to stand in front of a mirror, look yourself in the eye and say, “So, are you gonna do this or not? Are you a wanna be or a gonna be?”
Whatever might be holding you back, I wish you luck in moving past it. The good thing is that there are many positive resources out there, lots of supportive RWA members, advice books and networking groups to help.
I want to see your book next to mine on the shelf at Barnes & Noble next year, so no more excuses.
One Response to “What’s holding you back?”
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Love the sentiment, will do my best on the book, but I’m probably going to end up on a different shelf entirely.
Thanks for the inspiration, though!